isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
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