Is it weird I updated my facebook status from my phone while I had explosive diarrhea in my boss's private bathroom?
That would be awkward if he commented on your status
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
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