Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
