My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
Randomize
