God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
Randomize