Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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