Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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