office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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