Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
Randomize