the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
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