I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
the day after is always just damage control
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
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i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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