You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
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