I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
Randomize
