he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
My life is pants optional.
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