How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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