Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
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