A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
Randomize
