coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
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