Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
Disregard any previous text from the past 12 hours. Except for the one about scoring a strike while drunk bowling. Remember that one.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Randomize
