i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
