Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
