he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
