my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
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