this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
Randomize