its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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