I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
