New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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