I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
Randomize
