u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
Randomize