You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
I just woke up on my kitchen floor using a yellow pages as a pillow and surrounded by plants that used to be in the garden around my apt building, can't wait to see the security tapes for my eviction
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
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