At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
Randomize
