love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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