I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
Randomize