I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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