he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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