shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
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