She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
there was a trapeze. enough said
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Randomize
