Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
Randomize
