I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
The streets are paved with hand jobs
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