The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
Randomize