so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
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