I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Go christen that room with your naked body.
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
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