whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
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