Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
Randomize
