do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Randomize
