in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
he fucked my hip out of place.
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
I pour the whiskey from now on
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
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