Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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