I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
