Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
I'm too high and old for this...
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
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