Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
