No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
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