Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Randomize
